THE LOVE THING
By Eric Orji
SINCE ages women have considered looking beautiful a priority. This need not distract us away from their abilities as a human being which are no lesser than those of men and in many cases more than those of men. When we talk of attraction, beauty has always been associated with women. If you are a woman, how about quizzing yourself about your attraction?
Let us begin from what others think. That point of view may not be most important but is very important.
||How do others find you? Has someone complimented you about your particular qualities? Have men complimented about your beauty, or attraction.
This may have been direct or indirect. Talk to some of your friend, both men and women. Find out what they think and seek their frank opinion.
The major reasons why some women fail to attract others is the under projection of femininity. God has made men and women differently. If a woman talks as loudly as men, where is the femininity?
Bring out all your qualities that make you more feminine.
That is how you were born.
More application of makeup sometimes distracts from natural beauty. If your skin is good, why apply more makeup?
Consult a good makeup artist and find out how to accentuate your plus pints and hide your defects. It goes for dress style. Put on dresses that are feminine. Let men wear manly dresses. Looking attractive is easy, but you may have to change some habits and adopt new styles for that.
Once you do that, you will find offers of dates coming to you in plenty.
Silence can hurt relationships
EVERY relationship thrives on communication. The vibrancy of communication makes a relationship lively and strong. We like somebody because we enjoy talking to him/her. Without communication, the relationship will wither. Sometimes, women go into silence. They are hurt by something their mate did or said. Or they are thinking about some aspect of the relationship.
They go into silence and want to find the answers.
They feel that they are doing the right thing by going into silence. But the man does not take it that way. He gets confused, hurt and angry. He tries thinking of reasons of his woman going into silence.
That frustrates him. He begins hating his mate for troubling him with her silence. Silence can be good for a woman, but not for a relationship. If you want your relationship to thrive, you can as well think about it loudly. Request your man to not interrupt you while you are speaking and tell everything that is troubling you. That is a much better way of getting the load off your mind and also not hurting the relationship. Silence hurts.
How will you manage your man under stress?
My man has suddenly stopped caring for me? He looks so engrossed in his own thoughts that sometimes I get the feeling that I don't exist for him? What should I do? Is our relationship breaking? Is he not anymore concerned about me? What should I decide about our relationship? I am also getting under stress looking at his behaviour?
**THESE are the ways women describe their men when they are under stress. First of all let us look at how men react to stress, especially work-related stress? A man gets focused on the problems, and for most of the men till the problem gets solved nothing else exists. It is not their fault, but it is how men are programmed by nature. Once they face a serious work-related problem that causes them stress, they have a single goal- solve the problem. During such times, the female partner feels ignored.
She is not able to comprehend the strange behaviour and worries about the relationship itself. There is nothing to worry, but she worries because she never behaves this way when she is facing any problem. So she is not able to comprehend the situation.
What can be done? The first step for a woman is to find out if the man is facing work-related stress? If she gets the answer in affirmative, she should allow some space to the man to remain focused and solve his problem. Rather than worrying about the relationship, she should try to keep the man as much free as possible from other issues and support him silently. As soon as the problem gets solved, the man will become his old self.
He will thank his woman for standing beside him during his stressful period and the love will grow stronger.
We all are programmed differently. Let us always remember that love relationships demand giving. So if the need arises, donít hesitate in giving and try to understand what is going on. Women will strengthen the relationship if they support their men who become indifferent to everything else when they get focused on a work problem.
As I said before, donít worry about not getting attention from your man, but support him. He needs it.